Tomorrow is Egg Retrieval Wednsday!

Tomorrow is the day.  This cycle has been full of ups and downs-YES! Things are looking great.  NO!  We might have to cancel you.

So, just getting to the egg retrieval feels like a success.

We are only anticipating 5 eggs, but that gives us a fighting chance.  We will be ICSI’ing all of them.  Our plan is to transfer 3 or 4 of the embryos (if we have that many to work with)  given my history.  Even if we get pregnant with triplets lets say, with our history there seems to be a good chance that they won’t all make it.

My fingers are crossed and prayers are said that tomorrow goes smoothly and that we get some healthy, high quality, mature eggs-that will hopefully turn into our take home baby/babies!

IVF 2.0 is a go!

I had my baseline u/s this morning and everything looks good!  Surprised? I am!  My lining looks like it should, no large follie/cysts and my AFC was 10!!!  6 on one side and 4 on the other.  In the past year and a half of having ultrasounds, I’ve never had 10 resting follicles!  I don’t know if it’s just dumb luck, the DHEA, acupuncture, or a combination.  At any rate-I’ll take it!

I know that your AFC doesn’t necessarily correlate to eggs retrieved, but I’m happy to have some good news for once, and feel like I’m starting this cycle out on the right foot!  A large part of me was/is dreading this IVF cycle.  I’m become so pessimistic that I have a hard time believing that this will work, or that anything will work.  I had an ugly cry moment this past weekend-after Eric gave me my first Ganirelex shot.  Apparently Ganirelex burns a bit-and it pissed me off.  A majority of the time I feel like I’m going through all of this for nothing and I’m just setting myself up for more disappointment.    At least for today, I have a slightly better attitude!

So, tonight will start our stim shot.  As I was a poor and slow responder on my last IVF cycle, my RE has me on the max dosage of stims.  On Monday I will go back in to see what’s going on.  I’m afraid to hope, but I feel like this cycle *may* go the way I’m praying.

We have a plan!

Over the last two years so many things have changed, and seem to constantly change-so our plan has been ever evolving! IVF?IUI?TI?  This last loss, and consequent low AMH threw us for a loop.  Do we need to do IVF if we can get pregnant on our own?  Is IVF even an option due to my low AMH?  If we decide not to do IVF right now, will that be an option in the future?  After mulling over everything and looking at the big picture with all our test results-we’ve decided to go ahead and do IVF.  I am prepared though, that with such a crappy AMH, I might not produce many eggs-and if that happens, we will just convert to IUI.

Some might say-but you got pregnant on your own-why would you still do IVF?  I may be able to get pregnant on my own, and maybe I don’t NEED IVF, but I’m not willilng to gamble that we will get pregnant on our own, and lose what might be our last shot at IVF.  Maybe we don’t NEED it, or maybe we just got really lucky once-but the only way to find out would to keep trying on our own-and time isn’t on our side.  We have all the meds, already paid for, and my clinic is giving us a discount on this cycle, so if anytime would be good, now is the best.

Before this last pregnancy, a second IVF cycle was our plan.  Getting pregnant on our own could be a fluke, so I don’t want to change what we thought was the best course of action just a few months ago.  Aside from this having been our plan-my low and swiftly falling AMH is my biggest motivator for NOW.  Unfortunately I don’t have the luxury of waiting and seeing.  If this IVF doesn’t work, we aren’t jumping straight to Donor eggs or embryo adoption yet-but I want to give this IVF cycle the best chance-and doing it now accomplishes that.

It feels good to have a plan, but its also scary.  The past few months have been all about my healing-and I finally feel like I’m in a good place again.  Its scary that moving forward with treatment might rock the boat, but its a chance I have to take.

So, to my ovaries-get ready to gear up kids!  Ute-get sticky.  Here we go AGAIN.